16 May 2010

I was like, "whoa, my prayer was answered."

N8tr0n's job snuck up on me. I honestly didn't see it coming. Which is odd if you think about the fact that for a year and a half I've thought of little more than N8tr0n landing a job.

N8tr0n hung up his cell phone. "They offered me the job," he said.
"You're kidding!" I said, followed by stunned silence.

Have you ever waited to long for something to happen, and you've imagined your reaction over and over? Even though you know that when it actually happens your reaction will be nothing like your dreams? When N8tr0n uttered the words "they offered me a job," I wanted to jump up and down screaming, clapping, and smothering him with hugs. But instead, my eyes welled up with tears, I lost my breath, and I let that tingly wave wash over my body. The one that you get when something either really great or really bad has happened. I don't know about you but it's the same sensation for me; it just has a different emotion behind it. As my heart started to pound and I caught my breath I said,

"But I don't want to leave."

N8tr0n's job will take us to eastern Idaho. (If you simply must know the exact location please email me.) I love Idaho. I am over the moon for Idaho. You all know this. But whenever I think about leaving colorful Colorado, my heart feels like it is getting squeezed and my eyes start to sting. I never imagined that N8tr0n actually getting a job would be such a bittersweet experience for me. We've felt so trapped for so long that I thought only of the liberation that gainful employment would bring our family.

N8tr0n took a moment to remind me a few days ago (during one of my full-on crying sodes) that my word for this year is embrace. Once again, I am reminded that it was not on accident that I chose this word. It is time to embrace something new in my life. Something we've been waiting for for much too long. I think of this whenever I think of missing my two best friends' babies being born next month, or when I think of my cooking club. I think of it while we eat ice cream at Sweet Action, or I wander the aisles of Sunflower. It is time to embrace something new in my life. And though I may always miss things about Denver, there are new friends to be made and new corners to explore. Dear Idaho, here we come.

***

I absolutely must say THANK YOU for all of your wonderful support. We have felt your prayers and thoughts and your love has blessed our family. We can't wait to return the favor. Dear Blogland, you are the best and I love you.

***

P.S. We're moving in less than TWO WEEKS. Ouch. I'll try to post a bit on here between now and then but I'm not making any promises. I can promise that I'll be packing.


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18 comments:

Laurel said...

You guys are amazing and resilient and wonderful. There is no doubt in my mind that you will make your new locale your home. By the time we visit you next you'll have found all the cool places and we'll be playing games with your friends and I'll be all jealous that I don't live in Idaho with you just like you managed to make me all jealous that I didn't live in Denver. Love and hugs to you both, I know how hard it is to leave a place that you love, especially when it's filled with people that you love.

Katharina said...

Oh, sweet girl.
I hate change about as much as you do. I wailed like a banshee as I drove away from Colorado. Buckle up tight and hang in there. I will kidnap you when I come back to visit. There are great things to be discovered and built in that little town.
(But go ahead and cry a little...Denver is a place that gets into your heart.)

Tiffany said...

I loved this post and could relate to so much of it. Enjoy the next couple of weeks (if possible) and we'll all be waiting for you on the flip side.

Congratulations! It is truly deserved.

Crystal said...

I'm so excited for you! I've loved your sweet example as you've shared your feelings about the job hunt and life in Denver. And I know I'll love hearing about your new adventure. Yay!

Charlotte said...

I am so excited that Nate found a job and that your prayers were answered! Sometimes I prep myself so much for my prayers not being answered in the way I want that I'm surprised when God answers in exactly the way I want, and like you, I don't know how to respond. My heart hurts just a little thinking that you won't be in Colorado anymore (I won't be living there either—but still). I am so so so excited for your family—I'm glad that you're implementing your word now, at the beginning of this experience. All too often I think of how I should have responded instead of being pleased with how I did respond.

Hannah said...

I am so thrilled for you. Lucky for you, people love you immediately when they meet you. You will make close friends as soon as you arrive.

2 weeks?? Wow. Good luck with the packing! If you need to stop in Utah for dinner on your way up, we'd love to have you. Seriously.

jt said...

I know the bittersweetness (word?) of moving as well. 3 years ago when we moved here away from so many friends and family- But it has been a wonderful time for our family, and though there will doubtless be times of loneliness along with it, you will settle again. You will learn to love where you live, because there really is no other choice. (Did CJP ever give you that advice?) Take comfort that you will have family (relatively) nearby to help ease the transition. I wish I were nearer to help you move- I really hate the process! At least you don't have to worry about selling a house!
{Prayers for you-}

The Ostheds said...

Congrats to you and your cute family! We are planning on moving and it is only a half hour away and I am starting to wonder if we should be moving. It is hard to move away from people you have grown so close to! Good luck in the next two weeks! I bet your mom is estatic to have you a little closer! ;)

Christian and Jenny said...

I am soo happy to hear this news! Moving is always tough, when you love the place you're leaving. But what a rich life you two have already had together, and also Z. Just think what's still to come! Good luck with all the packing and May you have peace as you close a chapter and open a new one! :)

Kricket said...

I am thrilled for you guys. I definitely know about bittersweet moments and hope that you find a lot of sweetness in your new location!

michelle said...

This reminds me of something Grandma used to say: "Why are we surprised when our prayers are answered?" In my case, it's probably a lack of faith. Or maybe it's that those answers quite often sneak up on us when we least expect them.

I'm so happy that you guys have a job and an adventure ahead. Moving is always hard, no doubt about it, but I am sure that you will make new friends and have a new cooking group soon. Embrace. What a perfect word for your year!

Wiggs (The Beholder) said...

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYY! I'm just catching up on my blogs from the weekend. So first, YAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!

And second, I know how hard that can be. I was finally getting settled in my beloved Seattle when Dave got accepted to law school here in Chicago. Moving here was the hardest thing I've done in a long time, but I did it out of love for him and I've never once regretted the decision. I would never be where I am - I would never have gotten the book deal or landed in this amazing grad school - if I had resisted. So you're doing the right thing by embracing this new opportunity. It will be hard, but you'll look back on it and realize that it couldn't have happened any other way.

Congrats to you guys, and good luck with the move!

Pamski said...

Congratulatins! Change is hard but new life adventures are exciting. I'm glad you've decided to embrace it! We'll miss you for sure but your blog will make us all feel like we live in E. Idaho with you. Sorry I never made it to cooking club :(, but thanks for introducing me to Pioneer Woman!!

Staci said...

I for one am excited that you're moving closer to home! AND you get to live near your college town. Who doesn't dream of moving back to their college town?! All right maybe not everyone, but I'd LOVE to move back to mine.

I'm looking forward to seeing you more often and perhaps getting a family female trip on the calendar. Oh the fun we can have!

Kimberlee said...

I bet Denver is beside herself with you leaving. And although I feel a bit sad for Denver I know that East Idaho is all sorts of excited for you're arrival.

Just sayin'.

Anonymous said...

Congrats on the job! Once you wrap your head around all the changes you will realize it is exactly what you wanted!

Kali Jo said...

in honor of your moving closer i want to give you a house warming gift (i'm sure you'll have a home... if not you can bunk at kims', i'm sure she won't mind my volunteering since the phone call i recieved from her went something like this "GUESS WHAT, (heavy breathing followed as if she had just ran a marathon)"MIRANDA IS MOVING TO POCATELLO!!!!!!! so if she does for some strange reason not let you bunk at her house if you are indeed homeless when you arrive in poky ideeho there is always space at my house. You would just have to drive 25 minutes to American Falls but I would love to have you!!!
oh back to the gift. Anything I can cut out of vinyl for scrapbooking, house decorating or even just a sticker for "z cakes" is yours. just let me know!!
I can't wait to see you. We MUST plan a day to go to the zoo.

Jason & Makenna said...

Oh Mandy. I feel your mixed emotions. I wanted to be closer to family so bad I couldn't stand it. As soon as Jason had an offer (unexpected of course) and our prayers were answered to leave beautiful Charleston and head west my head started spinning. Both my babies were born there. Our first actual home we owned was there. The ocean. Historic downtown. I hit a bit of panic. But things work out and new experiences help us grow and make us better people. My heart still aches for Charleston and the east coast, but then I see my boys snuggled up with grandma and grandpa or playing cars with Uncle Jacob and I know we made the right move. CONGRATS, btw!!!

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